Saturday, December 12, 2009

Drunk In The Morning

I wanna make money to take away my problems
But my problems gettin' bigger with the more money I make
I wanna find love thats my problem,
cause the money makes it hard to tell the real from fake
I want to spend time with my son oh every hour
But the money and the problems and the working keep me away
I wanna be happy for just one hour,
but the only time I'm happy anymore is on the stage
I get drunk in the morning
I dont look for afternoons
I dont care if tommorow never comes
I been pushed and kicked around it seems my whole life
now I'm tired lord I'm so damm tired inside.
(I think its time to get it on)
So lets rock it with the band turn this shit up to 10 now!
I got a feeling you been waiting for way to long now!
And if your looking for a party you came to the right spot,
So drink 'em down motherfuckers and roll with the Kid Rock
(And the band plays)
And I thank you people for feeling me
I'm feeling you too
Oh what a ride,
its been up and down, all around the world
we've been
We're back
your here
lets make the most of our time now
And if you get up
(get up)
I wont let you down
And when the powder hits the brain,
you'll be feelin' it real son
I'm talking guitars, car sex and real cheap wine
All time and type you let me here it if you want more!
( Lemmie here it if you want more)
I gota fifth good music if you hold out I'll pour more
And I thank you people for feelin' me
I'am feelin' you too
Oh what a ride its been
up and down all around the world
we've been
We're back
Your here
lets make the most of our time Now
And if you get up, get up!
I wont let you down
Get up!
Get up!
Yeah what a ride, and I thank you, people thank you!
Written: Olsen, Kenney, Ritchie, Robert
Listen to the actual song its a link on the right

Christmas and Kids

I was thinking today about Christmas and trying to figure out at exactly what point in my life did Christmas become a depressing nightmare instead of a wonderful magical holiday. When your a kid there is nothing more special than Christmas, the tree, the lights and decorations, the music and of course the presents, but at some point it goes from being exciting to depressing. I know that as a child my family didn't have a lot of money, but it seemed to me that we always had a great Christmas.No matter what I got, I don't remember ever thinking that I got screwed and for the most part I remember being happy with whatever I received.

As an adult I find myself consumed by a feeling of inadequacy because I cant give my children what I consider to be a good Christmas, but is what I consider a good Christmas and what they consider a good Christmas the same thing?..Do the kids really put a high priority on the amount of gifts they receive or like me are they happy with whatever they get regardless of the cost or amount? Do I needlessly beat myself up over it?

Another thing that is bothering me is how to handle the Christmas situation between Divorced parents when one parent has more resources and less obligations??..I have a list of all the things my children's mother bought for them for Christmas, It seems to be everything they asked for, which leaves me feeling like a Heel, because I cannot compete with that, I might be able to get them 1 or 2 things and nothing of the level they will get from their Mom, I take this as a direct Insult and an attempt to buy my children's love and loyalty, am I crazy and paranoid or am I justified in this thought?

All I can provide for the kids is a father who loves them unconditionally, a good moral home, and discipline, a roof over their heads and food in their bellies. Which as an Adult I feel are the more important things to give them, but it still hurts me when my kids would rather go there because there they get all the "Fun" stuff. Will they grow out of that and have more respect for what I provide , or will they always think that I'm not as good as Mom because I don't give them everything they want?

OK back to the original thought, When does Christmas loose its magic? even after the whole Santa Clause thing was over for me, I still felt that Christmas was a wonderful time, I enjoyed the family dinners and the annual watching of "The Christmas Story" the music and the decorations..somewhere along the line that all went I find myself feeling like the Grinch or Ebenezer Scrooge..Just wishing it would go away and leave me alone.

Just because its Christmas doesn't mean the bills stop coming in, but it forces me to choose between paying bills and buying Christmas..I think That is where the true problem is with me. It stresses me out to no end trying to figure out how to make everyone happy..the kids, the wife, the utility companies..I cant please everyone and I want to, which makes this a depressing stressful time of year instead of fun and exciting.

I'm left wondering If it ever gets any better or is it always the same..year after year...Lets hope that someday it gets better..

Merry Christmas and Happy New year

Monday, December 7, 2009

Are people Blind?

How did the world become so cruel and unusual? Has it been in a slow decline since the beginning of time and finally we have reached the point of no return? I think that very few people in this world have eyes that are open, eyes that can see what is really going can everyone be so blind? is it by choice that they don't see..or is it that they were never taught to see?..are there people out there that choose not to see because what they see is frightening? I go out into this world and I am subjected to constant darkness..confusion..mis-information. I find very few people that can stand to look beyond their own nose..It seems like every time a little light starts to shine in the darkness..someone has to blow it out..why are people so afraid to view the world of reality?..I'm sure all of you have watched the movie " The Matrix" like most, the first few times I watched it I thought it was a good sci-fi movie, and I didn't read much into it..but upon further viewings ..I made a connection to it and real life, Now I'm not saying that we are all actually plugged into a computer somewhere..but we might as well be. we live in a world that is made up for us to keep us pacified while the life is sucked from us, then we are disposed of. So while I am asking the question why do people refuse to wake up..or to take the red pill I guess, is because like in the movie..most people are not ready to see the world as it really is..they are comfortable in the Matrix and they want to stay that way....I find myself feeling like the character in the matrix..that wants to just be plugged back in..unfortunately once your out..your out for good.